I never thought that my life would change so much. I thought I had it all together five years ago: a good job, a nice apartment, and a loving partner named Carlisle. I had no idea that my world was about to fall apart.
Carlisle’s mood changed when I told him I was pregnant with our daughter Bella. He was set on having the baby at home, so he ignored my worries and kept me from talking at the doctor’s visits. His mother, Martha, jumped in and told me that giving birth at home was something that their family did all the time.
I was suffocating, and no one could hear me. Carlisle and Martha worked together, which made me feel bad. The fights got worse, and both mentally and physically I was worn out.
That’s when I begged Carlisle to take me to the hospital. Instead, they called the doula, and I was in terrible pain for three days. “If active pushing goes on for more than 24 hours, we’ll finally have to go to the hospital,” the doula said. Those words still worry me.
The birth of Bella wasn’t the beautiful event that everyone talks about. I cried because I was relieved, not because I was happy. The truth came out at my first visit after giving birth: I was lucky to have lived.
That’s when I knew Martha and Carlisle didn’t care about me or my health. They thought of me as a mother. I chose to play their game by acting like I agreed with what they said about giving birth at home.
I was making plans to get away behind the scenes. I went to see a lawyer to make sure I had the right to keep our house and care for Bella. Knowing I wasn’t alone made me stronger.
The last straw was a family dinner where they talked about having kids with me like I was a machine. It got too much for me.
In a calm voice, I told Carlisle the next morning, “I’m leaving.” He was shocked, but I didn’t back down and showed him the court papers. “This is my house, and I’m going to keep it.” I want to have full care of Bella.
Carlisle’s face was pale, but I didn’t change my mind. “You need to pack your things and leave tomorrow.” “I’m done with this now.”
I went through a long and hard journey that taught me the value of self-worth and strength. I broke out of the bad loop and took back my life and the health of my daughter.
