While I was on a business trip, a strange voice message from my 10-year-old son Jake shook me to the core. What he said showed a scary truth: my husband Mark had made him feel like he didn’t belong in our own home.
I thought Mark would take good care of Jake and Tommy, his six-year-old son. But Jake’s letter showed a painful truth. Mark made Jake eat leftovers, which showed that he wasn’t important to him.
I tried to stay cool as I called Jake back, my heart racing. His smooth voice hid how hurt he was, but I knew I had to act quickly.
I booked the next trip home because I had a lot of questions. Mark had always been different with Jake. Had I missed the signs?
When I got home, I saw Jake’s happy smile, but I was still thinking about Mark. How could he make my son feel like he wasn’t welcome?
I cooked Jake’s favorite dinner that night, leaving Mark out on purpose. As soon as we sat down, I gave Jake and Tommy big amounts while making sure Mark got the point.
“Where’s mine?” Mark asked, not realizing that what he did was wrong.
Despite being angry, I kept my cool and said, “I thought you’d enjoy some special time, just like you gave Jake.” Mark’s face changed when he realized what he had done wrong.
The problem was talked about after the boys went to bed. Mark said he didn’t mean to hurt Jake, but I told him that intentions didn’t make deeds okay.
I made it clear that Jake was part of the family. “Treat him with the same love and respect as Tommy, or don’t bother.” Mark nodded, realizing how bad his mistake was.
The next morning, while Mark was trying to get back in touch with Jake, I watched him make breakfast. Even though it was a small step, I stayed careful.
It would take time to rebuild trust, but I hoped Mark would learn to love Jake as his own.
Did you ever defend your kid when they thought someone else would hurt them? Tell your story.
