Being a mum to four changed my life and gave me a lot of joy and meaning. But it also brought about problems I hadn’t expected, which tried my patience and determination. Managing my bond with my mother-in-law was one of the hardest things I had to do.
It got annoying when she kept coming over to our house without being asked. She would show up out of the blue, eat our food, and then leave a trail of dirty dishes behind her. Not only the lack of care that worried me, but also the feeling of being ignored and underappreciated.
Even though I was tired from taking care of four little kids, I tried to stay calm. But it was the last straw when she drank the last cup of coffee and then ate our family dinner. My husband and mother-in-law ate all of the pizzas I made with the kids after spending hours making them with me.
When my anger reached a boiling point, I spoke to them. But instead of recognising how I felt, they said they were worried about my weight to explain their actions. This reaction of dismissal lit a fire in me. I saw that I had been giving up my own happiness and needs for too long.
With renewed resolve, I put my health and the needs of my children first. My parents were there for me when I needed help, and they let me and my kids stay with them. This safe place helped me get back on track and rebuild my life.
Starting the divorce process was not an easy choice, but it had to be made. It was clear to me that my marriage had turned bad, and I needed to protect myself and my kids. As I went through this tough journey, I found my inner power and perseverance.
I’ve learnt a lot about self-respect and strength from this experience with my kids. Their mother has shown them how to stand up for herself and put her own happiness first. As a strong, independent mother, I’m proud of myself, and I want my kids to be able to do the same.
It hasn’t been easy on my trip, but it has changed me. I’ve learnt to put my own needs first, set limits.
