As Deon and I got closer to our 30th wedding anniversary, I was excited to celebrate this important event. It was a relief that Deon had a gift for me that would lead me to learn more about myself and accept myself.
Deon’s interested look caught my attention as I was getting ready for our dinner date. I was shocked when his gift turned out to be a box of jet-black hair dye.
“Why hair dye?” I tried to sound calm when I asked.
He told me that he thought I’d want to look younger. Even though I tried to hide how I felt, I was reeling inside. Didn’t he love me just the way I was?
I couldn’t get rid of the feeling that Deon’s gift had hurt me for a few days. My friend Susan heard me out and told me to stand up for myself.
I chose to make Deon learn something. To look decades younger, I dyed my hair dark black and changed my clothes. The point was to show Deon that trying to look younger wasn’t going to work.
When I went to Deon’s office in my new outfit, he was shocked. He asked with a voice full of doubt, “What happened to you?”
“I thought you wanted me to look younger,” I smiled back.
He tripped and said, “Well, Eve, I did, but not like this.” Based on what we talked about, Deon had done what he did out of worry, not because he wanted to hurt anyone.
In the evening, Deon came home looking beaten. We talked, and he said sorry for not thinking things through.
I told her, “I’m happy with my grey hair.” “It’s a part of me.” Those greys hold the story of our life together.
When I had coffee with Susan, I told her about my worries. She told me that Deon’s acts were probably caused by him not understanding things properly.
After a few weeks, I thought about our anniversary and what the gift meant to me. It occurred to me that we should have another talk.
“Can we talk?” This is what I asked Deon at dinner.
He listened carefully as I told him how I felt. “My grey hair is a sign that we’re both getting older.”
Deon gave me a tight hug and his eyes lit up with guilt. He said in a whisper, “I accept you as you are.”
I felt a wave of peace at that very moment. We couldn’t turn back time, but we could accept and love each other as we went through it. Our gift for our 30th wedding anniversary taught us a lot about love, accepting ourselves, and how great it is to get older together.
Deon’s gift started me on a trip of self-discovery by accident, but it made our relationship stronger in the end. I learnt that real love loves us no matter what, even if we have grey hair.
As our journey goes on, I’m told that love isn’t about trying to stay young; it’s about enjoying the beauty of getting older with someone. That’s a lesson that should be praised.
