As a parent, nothing makes you more upset than seeing your child cry and be scared. Lizzie, our four-year-old daughter, used to love going to Happy Smiles Daycare, but all of a sudden she started throwing fits and refusing to go. We were confused and scared by the sudden change.
Drop-offs in the morning turned into battles of wills that left us mentally worn out. “Mom, where is the child care?” Lizzie yelled. I can still hear “Please!” in my head. We used rewards, inspiring talks, and even her favourite stuffed animal, Mr. Snuggles. It didn’t work.
We were desperate for answers, so we asked the nursery staff. They told us Lizzie was fine, just quiet and liked being alone. Our worries didn’t go away.
One night, my husband Dave came up with an unusual idea: to find out the truth, he suggested putting a microphone inside Mr. Snuggles. I wasn’t sure what to do because I felt like I was bothering her, but our daughter’s anxiety made me change my mind.
A terrible truth came out in the recording. Carol, an older girl, picked on Lizzie by making monster threats and demanding snacks. Our world fell apart.
We ran back to the nursery and played the recording for the director and teacher. Right away, Carol was kicked out of school and her parents were called.
As we tried to comfort Lizzie, she told us about Carol’s pain. After that, the days were hard, but we found a new creche with tighter supervision and put Lizzie in therapy to help her get over what happened.
Surprisingly, Carol’s parents got in touch to say they were sorry and wanted to make things right. The way their daughter behaved was a cry for help because she was having a hard time dealing with her parents’ split.
We chose to feel sorry for Carol instead of getting angry because we knew she needed help. We still cared most about Lizzie’s safety, but we also hoped Carol would get the help she needed.
I knew parents should trust their guts when I looked at Lizzie. We learnt a very important lesson from our mistake: we need to be very careful and involved to make sure our kids are safe.
I promised myself in my head that I would always put Lizzie’s safety first, no matter what. As parents, we need to be like superheroes and always be ready to help and protect our kids.
“Mommy, how did you know I was scared at nursery?” Lizzie’s question still rings true. Even though it was funny, my answer is true: “Because parents are superheroes.” We know when our kids need help all the time.
