I thought the best day of my life would be when my first child was born. But it was the start of a nightmare instead. Michael, my husband, was nowhere to be found, so Emily, our daughter, came to visit me by myself.
There was a lot of excitement and expectation in the days before the birth. Michael had said he would be with me and hold my hand through all of my contractions. But as the hours went by, his absence got too much to bear.
Even though my mom tried to comfort me, I could tell she was worried. Where was Michael? Why didn’t he call?
After two days in the hospital, I was sent home with the hope that Michael would be ready with an explanation. In the nursery, I instead found a creepy quiet and a note that wasn’t clear.
The note said that he was going because of my mother, which shocked and confused me. What did she have to do with this?
When I talked to my mom about it, she told me something shocking: Michael had been seeing his boss. She found out he was cheating on her and told him he had to tell her or leave her forever.
My mother chose to keep this secret from me, so I felt cheated by both Michael and her. Why did she take away my chance to talk to him about it and try to fix things between us?
Things were painful and angry for days after that. It was hard for me to accept that Michael had betrayed me and that my mother had done what she did. I thought about our marriage and saw the signs: the late nights, the business dinners, and the phone calls that were muttered.
I tried to get in touch with Michael, but he was gone, just as quickly as he had come into my life. These were his last words: “I’ve grown to love Gretchen… I’m not coming back.”
I ended up with a broken heart and a baby to take care of. This is what my mom said: “One day, when Emily needs you to protect her, you’ll understand why I did what I did.”
But for now, it’s up to me to put the bits back together, deal with the difficulties of being a single parent, and figure out how to heal and move on.
I’m going to do everything I can to keep Emily from going through the same pain and heartache I have. She will never meet her dad, but she has me forever, and that’s enough for her.
